You knew it was coming. Well, you might have hoped or it wasn’t or prayed to whatever gods you worship to make it not come, but you knew it was coming.

Even after you stayed up all night putting those animal bones into just the right shape to summon Gorzok the Flayer. What a waste of time. But Gorzok is a lousy god, Tracy! We all told you this! And, predictably, he has once again failed to stop people from writing for the Forbes contributor network and remedial LARPing summer school.

Wife: Honey, I’m worried about Tristan. He doesn’t know the difference between throwing a lightning bolt and rolling for initiative.

Announcer: That’s why you need the Forbes contributor network and remedial LARPing summer school!

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